I mentioned yesterday that my mother bought me a beautiful desert rose for my birthday. I love those plants! I had three up until early June. I bought one several years ago that I was successfully nurturing back to health from a combination of a hard winter then getting hacked almost to death by my occasional yardman. Ralph bought me two this year for Mother's Day.
To make a long story short, I live in Village 1 of this subdivision. A kleptomaniac that steals flowering plants and yard ornaments lives in Village IV. All the Board of Directors of the five villages and the Sarasota Sheriff's Department are aware of this individual. I filed a claim and I never even got a call back from the Sheriff's Department. They do nothing because apparently she has some sort of mental disease. She's been quoted as saying, "I see things I like and mysteriously they show up at my house." Hmmmmmm, I wonder if that defense would work for me? I often feel a little crazy and go off half cocked, just ask Ralph and my co-workers. And I see dead yard thieves every where I look!
She has stolen from me several times through the years and this year she has been especially active. It's heartbreaking and hard to handle. Besides flowering plants and shepherd's hooks, she takes things that have sentimental value, like the garden stepping stone that my grandson made for me, the 10 year old staghorn fern that my friend's husband started for me, and the hummingbird feeder that Deb gave me for Christmas, etc.
Since the Sarasota Sheriff's Department does nothing, I sent an email to the president of our Home Owner's Association because a board member said the president can investigate this woman's house and yard for the stolen property. I offered, of course, to supply a very descriptive list of all the things taken and to go with him.
The president responded with a bizarre email that stated, among other things, "I AM NOT A COP!" Capital letters, just like that. Never did he say he was sorry for my loss. I abandoned him as a resource. Oh, he also said Sarasota Sheriffs are watching this lady and the Village IV board said she is no longer stealing. OK, fine. No longer stealing when, this month? The last few days?
Well, lo and behold, an email blast went out from Village I regarding flags, a wreath, and a wreath holder that was stolen from the island of the front entrance just after 4th of July. These were the 4th of July decorations provided by the board from the dues the home owners pay. The board was burning mad, vowed to find the thief, and promised to get restitution. The email also said they would not be deterred from future decorating projects. Brave, huh? The email implied the culprit was a Village I resident.
How could I resist? I immediately sent email and said it's doubtful a Village I resident would steal from itself. I added that I know the Village IV board says their thief has not been taking things and the Sarasota Sheriffs are watching her house, but really? I did not receive a reply. If this is CSI Sarasota, my money is on the Village IV klepto nutcase! What do you think?
I'm not brave enough to keep decorating my yard or to keep yard ornaments out there. My new plants are on the lanai behind the locked screen door and privacy screen. This used to be a nice community. Not so much anymore.
Opps, I promised to maintain a positive attitude and outlook. I positively promise to keep my plants safe, to keep a look out for the klepto nutcase who steals my stuff, and to provide therapy for her, just before I invite her in for beer, baked ziti special, and tiramisu.
Yea, you thought I was going to say, "just before I kick her butt!" Shame on you! *LOL*
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